more vampires who don’t remember more vampires saying ‘i don’t fucking know man, google it’ more vampires not remembering important historical figures more vampires not recalling centuries worth of history more vampires saying ‘ that was at least 300 years ago, how the FUCK could i remember that detail?’ more vampires whose brains work like human brains
More vampires who 300 years later can’t remember what was the truth and what was the lie they told to get out of trouble.
More vampires who are like, “I don’t know, man, I spent most of that decade in an opium den.”
More vampires who weren’t paying attention because they didn’t think it would be important.
More vampires who don’t know because there was lot of conflicting gossip and they don’t want to point any fingers.
More vampires who are just bad at dates. “Back in 1620, or was it 1645, wait, what year is it now?”
More vampires who were on a totally different continent when it happened, so get off their back and stop asking them questions already.
YES to all of this but also consider: vampires who only remember the most trivial stuff.
“Oh yeah, the only thing I remember about the American Revolution was this nice candlemaker I met sometime, and she was wearing this really cute red shawl…”
“Uhhh I don’t remember much about the fall of Rome but there was this one fucking cobblestone right outside the coliseum…”
Also consider: vampires who realize three or four hundred years after the fact that they knew someone famous.
Just sits up in bed one night screaming “THAT WAS GEORGE GODDAMN WASHINGTON”
its so weird how ur gender supposedly dictates which shapes and textures of fuckening cloth u are permitted to drape over ur flesh prison
I like to imagine that a demon who is trapped in their human vessel is saying this
demon: and tbh wtf is up with hair like??? some genders have to have longer strands of dead proteins emitting from their scalps but other genders have to keep their protein strands short??? weird shit
possessed person: yes the gender binary is stupid and arbitrary can we be quiet now
demon: also this whole makeup thing is suspect as hell like why cant all humans put pigment all over their oral openings why would that be an issue
possessed person: craig please i am trying to sleep
Giving their neighbors their rations claiming that the government fucked up that week because they noticed that they’re going without trying to feed their kids.
Signing up for the draft cuz, “Fuck it. We can’t die by their weapons anyway. I’ll fight for the country I’ve lived in for the past century.”
Vampire nurses who know when the blood’s gone bad or what type of blood you need (because blood typing was fairly new during WWII).
The baby faced forever 18 vampire siting with the older soldiers cuz he’s seen the same shit they’ve seen, even though he can’t tell them. They’re all watching the young “I’m going to be a hero” boys, sadly waiting for the ball to drop.
The vampire that has to explain how he was the only survivor in the ambush and why the enemy is torn to shreds.
The vampire solider, holding his best mate since his childhood begging and crying, “Please, let me do this.” But his mate won’t let him because he’s more afraid of living forever and watching the world move on without him.
Then, 70 years later, they come to the memorial, to commemorate everyone that fought, everyone that fell, and an old man looks at him strangely and says, “You look just like your Grandfather.”
PLEASE THIS IS THE KIND OF VAMPIRE STORY I WANT TO READ *GOSH*
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